USS Clueless: Earth to Timi

I've decided that I need to leave my job because it's just not a healthy situation for me. It seems like I'm working 24/7. There are some weeks that I work all 7 days. Why? Because it gets slow, people call off, someone botches a job, people get sick...yada yada yada. I can't take it anymore. It's taking a toll on me mentally, physically and spiritually.

My mood always changes when I enter the office. It's as if I pass threw a mood warp. I could be have a wonderful day, but when I get off of the elevator and walk down the hall, my mood changes. I feel a heavy burden of depression, and I hate it. I sit down at the desk, I lay my head down and ask "Why me?" It's a mess.

I had a sexual harassment incident with a co-worker the other day. Guys in the office were eating lolipops. That's normal. One guy brings candy everyday and he shares it. So, I saw the "Candy man" and I sparked up a conversation with him. This too is normal. He and I chat all of the time. I said, "TJ, can I have a lolipop?" He tells me that he has no more. I was like "Oh ok. Thanks anyway." I thought that was the end of it.

I left the office & headed to the break room. I got a bottle of water, and I headed back toward the office. On my way back, I ran into this jackass that I'm ashamed to call a co-worker. He says, "There aren't anymore lolipops left." I reply with, "I know. I've already been told." He proceeds to pull the lolipop out of his mouth and offer it to me. He said, "Here you can have mine." I said no and I rolled my eyes. He laughed. As I walked away, he said, "I might not have any more candy lolipops, but I do have another kind of lolipop for you to lick."

I immediatly stopped in my tracks. I turned to him and gave him a look that would've burned his soul if my eyes were fire. A female co-worker in the vicinity just gasped. There was dead silence. I was so shocked by his statement. I was speechless. I was feeling so many emotions at that moment. I want to curse him out (not in a good way either!), I wanted to punch the hell out of him, I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream...but I couldn't do any of that.

A production manager was present when the comment was made. He was equally stunned. A tech fixing the computer said, "Do you realize that you've just lost your job over a lewd joke?" The guy was still laughing and his only response was, "What? I was just kidding. You take everything so seriously." I said, "Go to hell! Now take that seriously." I went back into the office. I sat down opened a book, and I began to cry. A manager walked over to me and asked me if I wanted to file a complaint. I told him that I did want to file a complaint.

The complaint was filed. The manager asked me if there had ever been any flirting between the "assailant" and myself. I explained that we hardly ever talk. He's a new guy. I found him to be quite repulsive, so I've always kept my distance. It's interesting that the manager asked that question because I recieved an email from a co-worker stating that I flirt with him unconsciously. However, I'm 100% certain that the manager knew nothing about that email or the flirting that the co-worker mentioned.

I dont even know if anything will become of this situation. At this moment, I really don't care. I must keep my distance. Although, I must admit that I really insecure right now about my position. I can't work like that. It's not me. I shouldn't have to put up with crap. So, I must go.